1.27.2005

Live Fearlessly

True fearlessness is acting inspite of fear not the absence of fear. It's not being hindered by fear and boldly taking action.

I was listening to Chris Tomlin's new CD "Arriving"...a must have...and in one of the songs he talks about being the man he was created to be. The chorus goes something like this.

"I want to live like there is no tomorrow. I want to dance like no one's around. I want to sing like noboby's listening before I lay my body down. I want to give like I have plenty. I want to love like I'm not afraid. I want to be the man I was meant to be. I want to be the way I was made."

This is particularly poignant to me being that many times I let myself be held captive by fear...fear of what those around me may thing, that I may be considered odd, etc. But I got to thinking. This is really the way we were created to be. To live fearlessly for Christ knowing that nothing matters but bringing HIM glory. Profound...right? I've known this for awhile, and still I wonder sometimes why I live fearfully instead of fearlessly.

Well...I've decided that I'm going to dance even though someone may see, sing at the top of my lungs regardless of who hears or how it sounds, give like I have all the resources in the world, really love all those the LORD has placed in my life even though I may get hurt...I'm going to be bold. Or at least I'm going to try. I want the freedom of not caring what everyone else thinks. All that matters is what my FATHER thinks. His opinion trumps everyone elses so I'm only going seek HIS approval. I think we would all see a change if we really fought the hinderances that hold us back in our lives.

Many times, they've been there so long we don't even notice them anymore...much less resist. But really...what would happen if we all fought back? Can you imagine? If true Christ followers resisted the evil that strives to make us ineffective...if we stopped heeding that voice that sounds an awful lot like our voice which tells us to be quiet when we should speak or act...if we lived like we have nothing to lose... I don't think the world could handle the revolution that would follow such a force. That's power. If we all threw off those chains Paul talks about and walked in the freedom of the LORD... I'm going to give it a try...and try until I get it right. Anyone else up for an adventure?

1.26.2005

A Question for You.

I have a question I thought I'd pose to anyone reading this.

If someone wanted to meet people, where would him/her go? Think outside of the normal bar/club scene, church scene, etc. Where do people congregate?

I'm curious as to what you may say. This could get interesting.

Confessions...

I feel as though I should make a few confessions...not for any particular reason...since it really isn't a secret.

1. I sing rather loudly in my car. That's right. I'm that girl one lane over having the time of her life belting out a tune. Don't laugh. You do it too.

2. This is in reference to a dare recently issued to me by Melissa. We'll address it at a later date since I have just now changed my mind about making public the nature of the dare. But Melissa...it's more ridiculous than previously thought...so I'm out.

3. I still have secret delusions of being a "rockstar". Maybe I'll start a band...it's a thought.

4. My doctor makes me pay way to much money for allergy medicine that makes me sneeze. Go figure. Not really worth confessing...but now you know.

Well...I feel better. I'll post something profound and meaningful tomorrow. What can I say. It's Wednesday, and my brain is tired.

Oh...it's my sister's birthday so...HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MANDY!!!

1.24.2005


Here's a picture from my recent winter trip to the Fort Worth Botanical Gardens...one of my favorite photagraphic areas Fort Worth. Enjoy. Posted by Hello

1.21.2005

Born to be wild...or something like that...

So I'd thought I'd post something new...finally. Since I had a request to post about the recent road trip I took with three of the most fabulous girls you could ever meet, I thought I'd give a recount with commentary on the adventures of four young ladies and Austin, Texas...

Since we had a long weekend, a road trip was constructed and a plan put into action. We booked a room at the Double Tree...recently remodeled and pretty swanky...for the low price of $40. Thank you, Priceline.com. With that settled, we set out from Fort Worth Saturday afternoon...just the four of us...Lili, Tenille, Melissa, and yours truly. We chatted and napped our way to Austin.

Once there, we settled into our accommodations and began the beautification process for a night out on the town. We decided to eat at Thai Passion...a great Thai place downtown on 7th street. After dinner...since we were there anyway...we decided to cruise down the infamous 6th street to see what all the fuss was about. It was interesting. Especially since I was the only one who had ever been on 6th street before. The sidewalks were gradually becoming more crowded as guys stood outside of various establishments informing passersby that there was no cover and $2 wells just inside.

Then we saw it...or should I say him. The man we all know as Leslie was standing outside...in about 40 degree weather wearing nothing but a ladies top, a g-string, and a smile. When we saw him, he was showing off his bare hind parts for a camera...posing with a women for a picture. She must have been a tourist.

A short time had passed before Tenille asked me what wells were. I just chuckled and answered her...then she asked what domestics were. I answered that too and began to feel as though I knew too much about beer. And I don't really know that much...that's what's so funny. So we decided we should go in at least one place to see what it is like. We picked Coyote Ugly...I wanted to see if it was anything like the movie. Well, the girls do in fact dance on the bar...but I felt that to be degrading and embarrassing...and I wasn't even on the bar. We stood around awkwardly for about five minutes and decided to leave. As we walked up the other side of the street...we were informed by a young man standing on the corner that there were lots of guys in this place called Fuel and that we could get drunk there for less than $10. I couldn't figure out if we just looked desperate or if he said that to every girl walking by. Who knows. We laughed though.

Finally we found a place to hang out for awhile...the local Starbucks. Yes...we went to 6th street to have coffee. Hey...we aren't as young and wild as we may once have been. But we had a good time...sipping coffee and laughing.

By 11:30, we were back at the hotel and in bed. We commenced laughing especially when Melissa announced that she had a cramp in her 3rd toe which prompted Tenille to ask which one was her 3rd toe...and talking until we all fell asleep...about 2 am. But not before our resident 4th grade teacher...aka Tenille...made us go around the room and say something nice about everyone there. Want to know what she said to me? "Angie, thanks for telling be about wells and domestics." Lovely...I'm the beer girl. Makes a girl feel all warm and fuzzy inside. :) (Just kidding, Tenille. I know what you meant!) There were no pillow fights. No makeovers. Just good old fashioned fun.

We slept in, ate a Sunday Brunch at Threadgill's...complete with live gospel music...and visited the Bob Bullock Texas History Museum and the Capitol Building before journeying back to FW. I think it is safe to say a great time was had by all.

While you may be reading this and wondering why it is post worthy, let me just say...you had to be there. We can entertain ourselves better than any bar. We certainly are amusing. Ladies, we'll have to take another road trip soon. I couldn't imagine a girl trip without you three. It should be interesting.

1.18.2005

Daydreaming...

Oh what I would give to be independently wealthy and not have to work...for money at least. I'd still work...doing volunteer/pro bono work...and travel...and support causes/people. It would be awesome... Ahhh...how relaxing...how fabulous. Well...a girl can dream. Especially since that isn't likely to happen while I'm young enough to enjoy it. Don't get me wrong. I like my job. I like being a counselor. Hanging around with teenagers all day isn't so bad most of the time, but it can and does wear on a girl. I couldn't not work though. I'd get too bored. I need to have an occupation of some sort. I would just like to be free to do what I want. That's all. So if you know any single, attractive, Godly men who could support the aforementioned lifestyle...well...we should talk. :)

1.13.2005

Man.

I'm so glad it is Thursday. I've had to be in the classroom all this week...except for the day I spent sick on my couch which was a good day considering the alternative. And I still have another week of prevention education in the classroom. I'm so glad I'm not a teacher. However, having to teach this week has given me a greater appreciation for people like my mom and my friends who are teachers...even greater than the appreciation I developed from one year of substitute teaching. I don't think I'd want to do that job. Now the vacation is a different story...I do want that. However, I do like my counselor job when I get to see a bunch of different people in my office. It's not a bad gig since I don't have to deal with the behavior management side most of the time. So I give props to all teachers. You truly deserve a raise.

1.10.2005

Alright...Lurkers.
I was only kidding about the lurking. Lurk all you want. Roadkill and rosarie...do I know you? If so, identify yourselves please! Then, resume lurking. Thank you.

Lurkers...

I know you're there...just hiding in the shadows...reading but never commenting. I must admit. I used to be one of you--not commenting for some unknown reason. It's time to face your fear. Go ahead. COMMENT! Honestly, is anyone going to hunt you down if you disagree with a post. No. And don't be afraid to use your name when you post. There are few things more annoying that anonymous posters. I may not know you anyway so what's the big deal?! I implore you. Comment to your heart's content...non-anonymously! I think you'll find it a freeing experience.

1.07.2005

FYI

I have recently learned that MY Texas Tech Red Raiders are ranked 14th/17th in the nation depending on who you listen to. It doesn't matter though because either way this is the best end of season ranking we've had in 20 years. AND...there's a high school quarterback in Kentucky who has thrown for over 10,000 yards in his hs career who has verbally committed to Tech based on their Holiday Bowl performance...even though OU was trying to recruit him. Now...they don't sign until February so we'll see. In the event that he does sign, we'll have 3 quarterbacks with over 10,000 yards apiece in their hs careers...and that's a good situation to be in! Welcome to a whole new era of Red Raider football!!!

On the Mountain

"And He passed in front of Moses And he passed in front of Moses, proclaiming, "The LORD , the LORD , the compassionate and gracious God, slow to anger, abounding in love and faithfulness, maintaining love to thousands, and forgiving wickedness, rebellions, and sins. Yet he does not leave the guilty unpunished; he punishes the children and their children for the sin of the fathers to the third and fourth generation." Exodus 34:6-7

Imagine being Moses...stuck in the desert with millions of Israelites who do nothing but grumble, complain, and rebel against the LORD who delivered them from the domineering hand of the Egyptians. Yet, here is Moses--up on Mount Sinai with G-D Himself. Can you imagine how he must have felt?

Moses had to take deliberate steps to prepare himself for this encounter with the LORD. True, he had encountered G-D before when He called to him from the burning bush. Had Moses regarded Him as familiar and not followed His instructions to the letter, he would have been cut down. Instead, he was obiedient and, therfore, heard and saw the LORD.

I can almost picture what it must have been like. Moses standing on the mountain with the two stone tablets waiting for the LORD. Then, He descends in a cloud...concealing His face. Just one glance at the face of G-D and Moses would have perished for He is too much for mortal man to behold. Moses witnessed the LORD. He passed in front of Moses proclaiming His name and character before Him. Moses had the privilege of hearing the actual voice of G-D. The Word says the LORD spoke with Moses face to face as one speaks with a friend. I cannot wait for the day when Jesus calls me home, and I, like Moses, have the privilege of speaking with my Father face to face. What a glorious day that will be. It is what my heart longs for...to finally be home.

I think this passage shows the gracious, merciful side of the LORD when it comes to His people. He allowed Moses to be in His presence...not forgetting Moses was human...but forgiving his short-comings. The fact of the matter is this. Time spent in worship and in the presence of G-D is sacred. How dare we walk into His presence and treat Him as though He is less than what He is. His Word says He will not give His glory to another, but often we don't give Him the glory that is His. If I want to see G-D and to really hear His voice, I must be thoughtful in my actions and humble before Him. Yes, we are told that we can approach the throne of grace with confidence, but we cannot approach in flippant disregard disguised as confidence. If I really want to go deeper with Him, I must be prepared as the High Priest in Old Testament times prepared himself to enter the Holy of Holies...because that's where we go...into our Holy of Holies where we can commune with G-D. I know I don't have to wait for the glory of heaven to speak face to face with my Father, but may I treat each moment with Him as a sacred, holy moment and give Him the glory He deserves.

"You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart." --Jeremiah 29:13

1.05.2005

The Tale of the Psychologist

Alright. So yesterday I was sitting in an inservice meeting with the rest of the Juvenile Justice Alternative Education Program (JJAEP) staff preparing for a day of shear and excruciating boredom, which typically accompanies a meeting of this type. They actually paid a guy to come speak at this thing...only he wasn't "known" and he absolutely was not cool.

Enter the psychologist. At first glance, he looks like a typical PhD only slightly less frumpy. Allow me to describe this man. We'll start with his shoes...sensible black leather loafers...no penny. Moving upward, imagine black and white PLAID slacks. That's correct, ladies and gentlemen. PLAID. And it only gets better. Next you see a grey button down dress shirt. Only the color is a shade of grey rarely seen before and...if it is possible...in NO WAY coordinated with his plaid pants. This is accentuated by a multicolored tie. The tie actually looked like one of my teenage gangmember's attempt at spray paint art. It was awesomely bad. If VH1 did a show called "Awesomely Bad Ties"...this would be number 1. Umm...it was actually that bad. So that was what he was wearing. Furthermore...it is dang near impossible to guess his age due to the grey/white beard and the ring of grey/white cotton ball like fluff semicircling his otherwise bald head like half of one of Saturn's rings.

I'll get to the point where the reason for the description is evident. However, I do have a question. Why is it that the majority of psychologists or PhDs in general look alike? Is this typical? Middle-aged or over, balding, looking like they got dressed in the dark... It was curious. Especially when he began to talk. Now...this is where he got all kinds of interesting...and it wasn't due to anything he said.

First of all... It was 9 am after a holiday, and he starts off with an explanation of a book by Frederick Nietzsche. I forget which book since I wasn't exactly paying close attention. Plus, he was talking to a room of probabtion officers, teachers, behavior interventionists, non-profit agency workers, one counselor, and a couple of social works...all of whom couldn't care less about Nietzsche and his philosophy of good vs. evil. All of sudden he switches into his main topic which would be the difference between an emotional disturbance and a personality disorder. He never really got there, but during the course of his 2 hour rant complete with rabbit chasing tendencies, he did manage to switch into "ghetto doctor" mode. I'm not even kidding. He began to sound exactly like the kids that walk into my office on a weekly basis...with that tone and phrasing. You'd recognize it at an instant if you heard it. For example, the man actually said the following. "Chillin' to them is hanging with their hommies, their associates..." Hommies and associates in the same breath. At one point, he actually combined his ghetto doctor persona with a tragic attempt at the Valley Girl type lingo. It was so bad that he actually had to tell us he was trying to "do Valley Girl". Now...that really is a feat! It was absolutely amazing. Never before have I heard a PhD...who looked like a typical psychologist type...put Nietzsche (typical) and teenage ghetto lingo (atypical) into the same phrase. It boggles the mind.

It was, as you can probably imagine, quite humorous. Humorous was good since no one could follow the man, and he wouldn't have found a point if he sat on one. It was extremely difficult containing the laughter I so wanted to let out...but he didn't say anything funny enough to warrant that kind of laughter so he would of known that it was directed at him.

So now you see. While one may look and use subject matter that proves he is out of touch with his audience, he is capable of blowing all your assumptions by repeatedly saying "You know what I'm sayin'" in the style of a 13-18 year old trying to sound like a bad motor scooter. A truly fascinating experience to say the least.

1.03.2005

So I had a whole post finished and published...and then subsequently decided to change it. It was entirely too boring. So...anyone have anything exciting to say? I sure don't. I have found myself in my post-holiday slump...when I would rather be on vacation than at work...wondering why I am not independently wealthy which would enable me to be the best "lady of leisure" ever...so one and so forth... But alas. It was obviously not meant to be...at least at the present time. Maybe in the very near future.

I was thinking awhile ago about how many things changed last year in my life. Let's not recap it and pretend as though we did. Anyway, I hope this year is slightly more exciting and slightly less dramatic. Well, I do have an affinity and a flare for the dramatic so perhaps we'll keep the drama and add more excitement. Maybe this year I'll actually get to go somewhere that requires a passport. That would be cool. Perhaps I'll actually master snowboarding while in the mountains of California. That trip is in the works. Oh...as a sidebar...anyone know where I can get cheap airfare? And by cheap...I mean C-H-E-A-P. If you do, please let me know.

Well...enough of this. I'm going to find something mindless to do until 5 o'clock. Catch you on the flipside...of what you ask...use your imagination...